We Can Choose What We See

Over the past few days  I have been seeing all the posts on facebook about the disaster, or should I say catastrophic events, in Japan (I have seen most all the news on facebook since I choose to not immerse myself in watching it on television) and even how it could possibly effect us with the nuclear plant problems, and  I am thinking about "perception".

What has happened there is truth; it is concrete, with no disputing it.  The perception I am speaking of is what do people see as they watch or hear about it?  I saw one facebook post that said, "the most important things are the things going on in Japan."  I had to think about that one.

I do not consider myself a selfish person or an incompassionate person and I do feel so badly for all of those people having to go through that rubble just to find loved ones!  It is incomprehensible to me; however, for me it is not the most important thing in my life that is happening, and I'll bet it is not the most important thing for the people in New Zealand still recovering from the earthquake that happened a few weeks ago or someone with a loved one going through a terrible disease.(what a horrible catastrophe like that can do is to put  our problems into a more proper perspective.)  

I have a family that I love very much and for me, that is the most important thing going on.  I pray for the Japanese people as well as all those who are helping them, but I pray also for my family (and my friends) because there are situations here, from my perspective, that are just as important.

When these catastrophic events happen, I have to trust in God which in turn, lends me to a little more peace in knowing that He is in charge and that everything will be okay somehow 

(as well as doing my part in my physical and spiritual preparation).  How can there be fear and faith in the same place?  What we focus on is what we will see more of; so with that said, I'd like to focus on love today; on sending out prayers and love to all around me and to those in the world who need all the help they can get. 

And in getting back to perception (which is the topic of the week), how do I want to change the way I see the horrible events in the world today?  For myself, I am going to see the heroes all around me and all those who are compassionate and are selfless with their time and energy(both in Japan and in my little corner of the world).  Maybe if I  see  that enough, I'll be inspired to do and to become one of those people.  And even if I cannot do that in Japan or other places in the world or country that need help, I can do that in my own home and in the realm of my family and friends. 

Perception

As I have stated before, certifying in Rapid Eye Technology, I have access to the Skills for Life Manual that is used in changing and creating new methods of dealing with what life brings to us with opportunities for growth.  There are 7 Principles, with the first one being "Thought" which I wrote about a few weeks ago.  The second is the Principle of Perception.  (disclaimor:  I have gotten permission from Ranae Johnson, the founder of Rapid Eye, to use her Skills for Life on my blog and you can download some things from www.rapideyetechnology.com)

A few "blogs" ago was, "what color are your lenses"?  In truth, the "color" we see through is our perception of life.  "Perception is our beliefs based on our experience.  The way we perceive our present-day world is based on how our world has been perceived in the past, and the meanings we put on those experiences are based on that perception..... Perception can make whatever picture the mind desires.  This is especially important to remember in the way you perceive others.  Whenever we judge anyone, we are really judging those aspects in ourselves.  It is impossible to see something in someone else unless we perceive it first in ourselves on some level of experience" ---Ranae Johnson    My experiences have probably been different than yours so my perceptions are most likely different from yours.   And I have noticed, many times, that I have gotten irritated or angry with my husband or even my children and then had "aha" moments in which I could see the same things in myself that i was irritated with them!  We see in others what we see in ourselves and therefore, "mirror" each other.  The challenge is to change what we see in ourselves!  "There is no right or wrong in perception,.  Perception simply 'is'! 

Here are a few "awareness" checks:

                                                  FIND THE "F"'s         

                                         

                                       FIGHTING FIRE FIGHTERS

                                          ARE THE PRODUCT OF 

                                          YEARS OF CAREFUL 

                                          TRAINING COMBINED

                                          WITH YEARS OF

                                          ON-THE-JOB EXPERIENCE.

So look and count the "f"s carefully.  How many did you discover in your perception check?  Some will find 3, others 5, and a rare few will find 9!  How many did you discover?  Those who find 4 are only looking at the body of the sentence and are ignoring the title which contains 2 more.  Thos who find  9 see 2 in the title and 7 in the sentence itself.  If you are still struggling, count the word "of".  Three more "f"'s now jump out of the page.  Missing the letter "f" in the word "of" is common.  

   

 Let's try one more:              WHAT DO YOU READ?

                                                        

                                                         WHAT

                                                        IS THE

                                                     THE POINT?

(I'm hoping this one will work since it really has a triangle around the message, but let's give it a "shot")

"What is the point"?  This seems pretty simple, but it is not what it says.  Reread the question, do you see anything differently?  It really reads, "what is the "the" point"?  "THE" appears twice yet most people do not see the duplication.  Examine times when you and an important person in your life viewed something differently.  Convinced of your own perspective, each of you missed the opportunity for more meaningful connection.

I have had many conversations with my husband in which we were almost speaking "past" each other because each of us had a differen  perception of the subject.  And I have also had experiences in which I have felt a little "crazy" trying to convey an idea or thought to a friend in which they didn't "get it"!  Their perception was obviously different than mine.  "Experience results from our perceptions, which are filtered through such factors as our history, culture, values, desire, education, and awareness.  Given our perceptions and filtering system, we begin to have a clearer understanding of why people struggle with understanding reality."---Ranae Johnson

"We are influenced more by what we think is so than what actually is so.  Our perceptions of reality do more to govern our behavior than reality itself.  When we learn to pay attention, we create the opportunity to switch from reacting to acting... We can discover a whole new world when we are open to the learning.  When we are willing to move off our position, and be receptive to viewing things from a different perspective, our perception of our world will be different.  Consider the possibility that if we accept the level of love offered from others and from ourselves we would have a different view."---Ranae Johnson

 So this week I am going to be working on the Principle of Perception in my life; I invite you to do the same.  I know all of this starts to feel a little "daunting" (especially when adding in the Four Agreements and in just working on our everyday projects), but let's not forget that it all begins with "thought".   

               "When we change the way we look at things, the things we look at change."

                                           

The Easy Button

Staples(the office supply store) makes a big red button they call "the Easy Button".  When you push the button it says in a man's enthusiastic voice, "that was easy!".  I bought one about 3 years ago because I do like humor (think I've mentioned that before).   I have it sitting on the counter in my kitchen next to my phone and I pass by it all day long.

When I have a difficult task to complete (or a task that I just don't want to to) I love to "hit" the easy button as I pass by.  It puts a smile on my face and makes whatever I did a little "easier" if not only in my mind. (aren't most of our "motivations" mental?)

In fact, about a year and a half ago I was watching the daughter of one of my friends and she needed to do a science project for the next day at school.  Now, I'm not a science person nor did my children do any kind of "science projects" that I can remember or at least they weren't anything really complicated.  This darling girl wanted to make a volcano!  I had no idea how to go about it and even in looking up instructions on the internet I was feeling very overwhelmed and a little panicked!  (just thinking about it right now gives me a little anxiety!*S*)

I was "whining" to this 5th grader and telling her that I couldn't do it (pathetic, huh?*S*) when she all of a sudden hit the easy button that was sitting on my desk!  Well, we laughed so hard and we made the volcano, and if I say so myself, it looked pretty good and it even worked!

So today, I've been struggling a little bit, feeling a few little setbacks and not quite understanding when with all my "trying" that I still allow things to affect me (and actually feeling a little sorry for myself).  I'm having to do some cleaning and for motivation I play my "workout" music loudly and as I was passing through my kitchen saw that little "easy button" and thought, "why not?"  So I hit it and I hit it hard!*S*    (and then a smile came across my face and everything felt "easy"!)

                                                                              

                                                                                  

What is your motivation and how do you carry on even when you don't feel like it?

  "You can't make footprints in the sands of time if you're sitting on your butt.  And who wants to make buttprints in the sands of time?"----Bob Moawad 

Enjoy This Moment

Today I was sitting in a waiting room at the University of Washington  Hospital while my friend was in waiting for the doctor to hopefully giver her a solution to some nagging medical problems.  (we drove over yesterday for a short appointment and the final appointment was today).  So I sat waiting and it was okay.    And then this quote came into my mind,  "Enjoy this moment for this moment is your life." (I don't know who said it, but I love it.)

I would have loved to have had some extra time to do some more shopping in the U District or exploring parts of Seattle or going back to IKEA, but I "sat".  I had my iphone with some game apps and I was surrounded by lots of different people, some of whom were noticeably ill (it was the surgical specialties center).  

   

 I realized that even in "just sitting" and "waiting" that was my life at that moment and I still had choices to make right then.  I had the choice to be impatient and irritated that it was taking a while OR I could sit there and be grateful for my health, that I'd had that short trip with my friend, that my youngest son was on his way home for Spring Break, and that I had a husband who supported me in helping out a friend.

We all have choices to make daily whether in just the ordinary of even doing the dishes or away from home and enjoying new experiences.  No matter what my choice is in the "moment", the minutes of my life continue to tick away and I'd hate to waste those (I've wasted too many in my past).

There's a great quote by Mary Englebreit that goes, "Time flies even when you're NOT having fun."  So, I think I'd rather choose to have fun, for I believe we can find "fun" or at least "positive thoughts" no matter what we are doing. 

What Color are Your Lenses?

Several years ago my husband accused me of wearing rose-colored glasses and I took that as a complement!*S*  I really do try and see the best in people and in situations and although I slip up at times, I feel better when I stay positive.

We've all heard the saying about your glass being half empty or half full; it's all in how you look at things and I believe we can train ourselves to change our thoughts in order to see things in a positive way.  I choose (at least try to most of the time) to see things in the positive because it helps me feel happier and more hopeful.

In an article titled, The Spirit of Optimism by Gordon B. Hinckley ( New Era magazine, July 2001) Pres. Hinckley writes, ""We have every reason to be optimistic in this world.  Tragedy is around, yes.  Problems everywhere, yes....You can't, you don't build out of pessimism or cynicism.  You look with optimism, work with faith, and things happen."

We cannot change what is happening in the world or even what is happening in our communities and sometimes it's difficult to even change what's happening in our own homes, but we can change the way we look at it.(I'm not saying this is an easy thing to do, but I believe it is of utmost importance, at least to me, to stay positive for my own sanity) , but we can change how we look at it which will lead to feeling hopeful which will move us to positive action on our part which will then reinforce our hopeful feelings!(it's all connected, isn't it?*S*)

 "I am asking that we stop seeking out the storms and enjoy more fully the sunlight.  I am suggesting that as we go through life we 'accentuate the positive.'  I am asking that we look a little deeper for the good.....What I am suggesting is that each of us turn from the negativism that so permeates our society and look for the remarkable good among those with whom we associate, that we speak of one another's virtues more than we speak of one another's faults, that optimism replace pessimism, that our faith exceed our fears.  'When I was a young man and was prone to speak critically, my father would say: 'Cynics do not contribute, skeptics do not create, doubters do not achieve."

                                                            ------Pres. Gordon B. Hinckley

 So, back to my original question:  what color are your lenses; or in other words, what do you see when you look at the world, and how is it working for you?

A Different Perspective on "Assuming"

I was checking past posts on Thought"full"ness the other day and came across a great comment on the post, Don't Assume Anything, which gave me different insight to the phrase.  She commented about assuming things about herself that might not be true(you can go read the comment if you like on that post).  I had not thought that I had assumed things about myself, but after talking this morning with my workout buddy(great therapy!*S*) we came to the conclusion that it's very possible to do.

 I absolutely loved going to Rapid Eye Certification and loved the people there and really felt so much love and acceptance there; however, there are so many amazing people there that I assumed that I didn't measure up to them!  In consequence of that assumption, I put up some walls  and wasn't able to be as fully involved and learn as much as I would have if I had let myself be present in the experience.  Don't get me wrong, I learned so much and would not trade that training and experience for anything, but I could have learned and experienced more if I hadn't put some short walls up.

 Some of us assume we don't measure up to those around us; assume we're not smart enough, assume we're not thin enough to wear cute clothes, etc.(you can add your self-assumptions here).  There are a myriad of negative things we can assume about ourselves; however, in reality, those assumptions aren't the truth.  We can step outside of ourselves and our experience and see that we are more than we think of ourselves sometimes.   Most people don't make the assumptions about us that we do!  

What are those negative assumptions about ourselves doing to us? (because we do get results from what we think and see about ourselves)  In my experience during Rapid Eye Certification I lost out on some of my experience which I am sad to say.  If I assume I'm not cute enough or outgoing enough, what will my result be?  Will I miss out on some great experiences or will I not allow myself to participate in growing experiences?  (now, we don't all have to be the same; we all feel comfortable in different situations and have different talents and I am certainly not saying we all need to be the same, but we can be our best selves).  

Maybe the trick to not assuming untruths about ourselves is just to get to know ourselves a little better; to value who we are and have gratitude for who we are; we'll never be anyone else!   (I would love all kinds of different thoughts on this subject)

"If you insist on measuring yourself, put the tape around your heart rather than your head...."

                                                                                                 ------Carol Trabelle

 

Practice Makes Perfect

              Be Impeccable With Your Word       Don't Take Anything Personally

                   Don't Assume Anything                       Always Do Your Best

"When you honor these four agreements together......If you are impeccable with your word, if you don't take anything personally, if you don't make assumptions, if you always do your best then you are going to have a beautiful life.  You are going to control your life one hundred percent." --The Four Agreements

This is the end of the road as far as my posting about  The Four Agreements, but it's only the beginning, at least for me, as to what I do with these agreements.  I certainly don't "worship" this author or this book, but I believe these 4 principles, if lived to the best of my ability, will lead me to a better place in my life.  If you think about it, these are basically the teachings of Jesus Christ and I believe I can find truth in many places.

This is a new week and I am looking forward to better things as I keep my thoughts "in check".  I am finding that when I start to feel badly that I make a conscious effort to look for the "thought" that may be the cause behind that feeling.  I am certainly not close to living any of these agreements perfectly and I am not sure I'll ever be "perfect" at any of them but I can keep on trying.  

"So if you fall, do not judge. Do not allow yourself to turn into a victim.  No, be tough with yourself.  Stand up and make the agreement again, 'Okay, I broke my agreement to be impeccable with my word.  I will start all over again.  I am going to keep the Four Agreements just for today.  Today I will be impeccable with my word.  I will not take anything personally, I will not make any assumptions, and I am going to do my best.  If you break an agreement, begin again tomorrow and again the next day.  It will be difficult at first, but each day will become easier, until someday you will discover that you are ruling your life with these Four Agreements.  And, you will be surprised at the way your life has been transformed."                                                                                                                          ---- don Miguel Ruiz

So, for today, amidst putting all of the Christmas boxes that are filling Rob's room back up in the attic (you think I've waited long enough?*S*), I will remember the Four Agreements, but especially the last one which is "Always Do Your Best".

"Remember that what is hard to endure will be sweet to recall."----Tote Yamada