Today I have been reflecting on this past week. I've improved in some areas but need much improvement in others. An "incident" this morning shows me that I am not "there" yet! I was watching a program on BYUTV when my husband came in the room, and not realizing that I hadn't started the program at the beginning, asked me a few questions about what was going on. Instead of stating with a "kind" voice that I didn't know the answer to his question because I hadn't watched ALL of the program, I'm sure my voice sounded exasperated because he was asking me questions. (at least I think that's what his perception was). The positive thing out of this was that "immediately" I knew that I had to make it right; that I didn't have the luxury of letting it go on and on. That is a great thing; it's a gift to realize what you've done as soon as you've done it and have the desire to fix it.
Obviously my thoughts weren't directing me in the right direction; but I know that no matter how hard I try that I cannot do it without the help of my Savior, Jesus Christ. I realize that everyone doesn't have my same belief system so however you get your strength in positive ways, I honor that. My strength comes from my Heavenly Father and his son, Jesus Christ.
I haven't "officially" apologized yet for my reaction to my husband's questions; I did make pancakes as a peace offering but I know the words have to come, and they will....very soon, and I will start over again and make a greater effort to improve.
This day is not halfway over yet; so I look forward to more learning, to more thoughts on how my week has gone and ways to move forward in the next. I invite you to do the same for we are all here on this earth to learn and to grow.
I know what you mean. It's like learning as children that there is a consequence to our choices. If we could stop ourselves in our tracks before we say something not so kind then the day wouldn't have to be spent trying to make it up. But we could move on to something much deeper and happier. But that's life. If both husband and wife could learn changing old patterns of it only matters what we do not what others do around us or to us, then all would be well with the world. Sometimes though we just want someone to say what is the matter. I have no idea if this makes any sense. I guess it does to me though. It's coming from a place of love and hope.
ReplyDeleteSunday was certainly a struggle for me; another day to learn and re-learn and I'd like to NOT repeat it again if possible!*S*
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