My Reaction Reflex

I was sitting at my desk trying to think of a word relevant to my life that starts with R and had an interesting experience, one that has happened to me more than once, and it was so clear: my reaction reflex. 

How many times have you had someone decline an invitation and your reaction was the feeling of rejection or embarrassment that you invited them in the first place?   I sent out some invitations via facebook for a girls' night out that I'm going to host for my Daughter-in-Law and just had someone decline.  My first reaction was the feeling of rejection and then embarrassment in which I quickly changed to rational thinking, "I'm not being rejected just because she can't come to my girls' night out; she has other plans."  

Whatever works for you and me in order to not feel rejection is fine; there's no need to react with such negative thoughts which turn into negative feelings.

I have a tendency to react quickly to situations rather than to take a minute to think about it; not a good thing, but my reactions are usually internal.  I would not want anyone to know that I wasn't okay; ever.  I know some people don't have such quick reaction reflexes; I admire that.  Is there a trick to that?